Thunderbozz

It may look harmless, but some people complained about this advert to the Advertising Standards Authority . Not because of the effect on the environment; not because their house was splattered with paint; not because there's a scary clown in it, either... Because it was insensitive in "today's climate of terror" . Some people really need to get a grip on reality.

I'm not the world's biggest fan of Hallowe'en. In fact, I can't stand it. And it annoys me that people are more willing to put a lot of effort into "celebrating" it than they are for St. George's Day. Mind you, this lady had it much worse. I've always enjoyed listening to Billy Bragg. Not just for his music, but also for his views on nationality, patriotism, and what it means to be English when we're all born under two flags. I'm ashamed to say I don't own any of his music - because I refuse to download it illegally - but if anyone wants to buy me his new book or new box-set - they're more than welcome. This year's English Literature course is rubbish. The books I have to read are dull, un-inspiring and lack any individualism. After a while, one slightly bawdy Restoration play simply merges with the next; one crack-pot Critical and/or Literary theory runs into another. I am not looking forward to writing essays on them; I ...

Photos from dartfordfootballclub.co.uk ∆ The main stand, complete with solar panels (on roof) ∆ The main stand again ∆ The dug-outs - seemingly fresh from Ikea Roll on, November 11.

You will need: A section of piping A speaker A canister of gas Fire.

The DaVinci Code Quite a clever film (clever in the same way a wordsearch is clever), but ultimately ridiculous. Dartford 3-1 Godalming Town The mighty Darts move to second in the league, with 19 points from 9 games. The Killers - "Sam's Town" More albums should have an enterlude and exidlude . More albums should be as good as this one.

Some excellent cover versions from The Hype Machine : David Gray sings Smile Like You Mean It by The Killers Editors sing Feel Good, Inc. by Gorillaz The Mystery Jets sing The Pioneers by Bloc Party

Well, it's Tuesday morning and I'm already settled in to the university 'regime'. I've had three fairly painless lectures and one very painful trip to the university bookshop (£100, gulp), and it feels as though I've never been away. Which is excellent, because it means I'm enjoying myself. It wasn't long before the complete "set" of students made themselves known in my lecture-cum-seminar yesterday: The feminists: one claimed that "the 'working class' did not exist as a definable group, but was simply a idea that men invented to prove their masculinity". In case you can't tell, I'm rolling my eyes. The foreign students: In a class with only around 2o people, two are American, one is Finnish (!) and one is from the former German Democratic Republic. They're German. The mature students: Useful for the inevitable "what was it like in the 80s?" question The Marxists: there's always one.

Dartford beat a very poor Folkestone Invicta side in last night's Ryman League Cup game. After going 2-0 up in a more lively second half, they expolited our dire defending to snatch back the equalising goals. Extra time came and went, before finally getting the deserved result through a 5-3 penalty shoot-out victory. In other news, police have raided Wentworth Drive in Dartford (on Google Maps: the house directly opposite the primary school gates) and two other properties as part of Operation Trident. They found " hundreds of guns " and recon on taking three days to bag and tag all the evidence. I'd like to take this chance to re-assure you that there are no guns in my house.

Dartford's excellent start to the season continued throughout August and into september, with wins against Kingstonian and Whyteleafe (never heard of them either). Alas, all good things must come to an end, and our unbeaten run was ended by then bottom-of-the-league Hastings. Dartford 1 - 0 Kingstonian Whyteleafe 1 - 3 Dartford Dartford 0 - 2 Hastings The league table still looks promising though, with the Darts now sitting in 3rd place... Ryman Division 1 South Pld W D L GD Pts 1 Dover 5 4 0 1 +6 12 2 Fleet 5 4 0 1 +4 12 3 Dartford 5 3 1 1 +6 10 Princes Park has taken another step closer to opening with the grand unveiling of the roadsign into the ground. Granted, it was just 2 workmen putting the thing up, but one step at a time...

The above photograph is from 2007. It shows the assassination of George W. Bush. Of course, at the moment the photo it is merely a mock-up, created by Channel 4 for a new programme to be shown on More4 , "Death of a President". They claim it is a "thought-provoking" rather than "sensationalist" documentary designed to look at Bush's foreign policy from a new angle. It is a typically controversial attempt to bolster the channel's ratings - More4 is funded by advertisements, and needs proof that people are watching to earn the most cash. Here in Britain, we can dismiss such tactics. But in America, it's provided sensationalist extremist yanks with enough ammunition for another anti-British-establishment rant. Fox News, possibly the most biased of all news agencies reported the programme as being commissioned by "BBC Channel 4". American companies have threatened to boycott advertising their products on Channel 4 channels. Progra...

A 2-2 draw in the Monday night fußball fest sees Dartford drop slightly to 3rd place in the league after 2 games. In more exiciting news, the opening date for the new stadium at Princes Park has been revealed: the 11th of November will be the first home game played at "the Park", when we take on Horsham YMCA - or possibly not if we're drawn away for an FA Cup clash. Still, why let mere possibility get in the way of the hype, eh?

An excellent start to the season for the Darts this weekend, going top of the league after a 6-1 win over Burgess Hill Town. Alas, I was stuck at work the whole afternoon... Ryman Division 1 South Pld W D L GD Pts 1 Dartford 1 1 0 0 +5 3 2 Dover 1 1 0 0 +3 3 3 Sittingbourne 1 1 0 0 +3 3 Molesey Town - fresh from a defeat to Dover - are the visitors to Thurrock on Monday night for our first "home" game of the season. Come on you Darts!

There were some flaws in Engrenages , but they were mostly trivial. The writers were clearly so confident in selling the show abroad* that towards the end it subtly praised all things French. All the cool people drove brand-new Renaults, and more and more shots of the Eiffel Tower began to creap in... at one point there was even a patriotic "not in this great republic" comment from the judge. Hideous Americanisms aside, the series was excellent. It is grim, both in content and appearence (you are left wondering if your screen's contrast settings are all wrong after only a few seconds), but I look forward with great expectations for the second series to be shown on these shores... hurry up and write/film it, Canal+! *ironically, you can't buy the DVD here...

Bless them lads that make up the band "The Feeling". Just so there's no confusion, they've made their music videos so blatently linked to the name of the song (in case we forget what we're listening to). Hence, they all get sewn in the video for 'Sewn', and in 'Fill My Little World Right Up', they're all performing in a little world (a terrarium) that gets filled up. I can't wait to see the video for 'Kettle's On'.

Having caught a glimpse at one episode a few weeks ago, I was instantly drawn to finding out more about French drama series Engrenages ( "Spiral" ). Partly because I enjoy finding obscure programmes on BBC Four - especially those that require English subtitles, but mainly because the direction immediately drew me in to the story. I found that short glimpse of the characters so intriging that rather than watch any more of it, I had to switch off and find out when the series would be shown again in full. Luckily, all eight episodes are being shown this week in double-bills. After finishing work at 10.00 pm last night, there was plenty of time to get home, get some food and settle down to a real treat of a television programme. In French (with subtitles), Engrenages is one of very very few French television programmes to be shown here in England, and you can see why. A gritty crime investigation unfolds following the discovery of a mutilated body in a skip: many scenes...

The mighty Dartford return to the borough this season in the brand-new Princes Park stadium. It was in 1992 that we last played a proper home game: and it's now just a matter of months before we can kick off on home turf. Pre-season games Thamesmead 0-3 Dartford Whitstable 3-3 Dartford Tilbury 1-3 Dartford Slade Green 0-3 Dartford East Thurrock 1-1 Dartford Tunbridge Wells 0-2 Dartford Bournemouth Poppies 2-2 Dartford Folkestone Invicta 1-0 Dartford Our pre-season friendlies have yielded some fairly encouraging results, with the Darts remaining undefeated until a Folkestone goal at the death of yesterday's second half leading to an unlucky 1-0 defeat. The team - largely similar to last season's - knows each other well and all looks promising. The 2006-2007 campaign kicks off next Saturday away to Burgess Hill Town (West Sussex). This year, Dartford will be playing in the Ryman League, Division 1 South (that's the eighth tier of the English football pyramid, or only 7 pr...

I'm gradually working my way through all the films I've taped off Film4 , and last night it was the turn of the American film 13 Conversations About One Thing (2001). It's a look at the lives of four characters told through, surprisingly, thirteen scenes. As the film progresses - often painfully slowly, but none the less beautiful for it - we see how their lives intertwine. There is a focus on the minuscule: often the smallest comment, reaction or expression is responsible for something much bigger, much more important. I'm glad I've seen this film, if only to reassure me that Americans are capable of producing high-quality thought-provoking films without the need for instantly-recognisable faces as justification. "Good Night And Good Luck" was an excellent film, but it was still deeply rooted in American politics and culture: "13..." shows that (some) Americans do share some qualities with the rest of the human race.

I've seen it once at the cinema, but I couldn't resist watching "The Italian Job" (2003, USA) one more time, if only to compare it with the original I have on DVD. How they can claim that this film is a "re-make" of the original, I'm not really sure. Yes, there's Mini Coopers and a plot based around messing up the traffic systems, but the 1969 version was never about stealing the gold. It was about Charlie: about his own cunning, wit and charm. Croker's character provided everything, from the memorable one-liners to the tragic fall . OK, perhaps the new version brings the action kicking and screaming up-to-date: but where's the charm? "Remember - in this country, they drive on the wrong side of the road" - Charlie Croker (1969) "You should never mess with Mother Nature, mothers-in-law, and mother-freaking Ukrainians" - Skinny Pete (2003)

Mystery shoppers are annoying. Especially when you're over-tired. Because you spend all morning (from 7.00 am) being artificially nice to people, smiling and packing their shopping, grinning and bearing argumentative, slow and/or down-right rude people, and trying to put away cigarettes and sandwiches and the day's bread deliveries... all with no recognition. But forget to ask someone who has bought one sandwich and one drink if they'd like a receipt, and damn it: there goes the reputation of the whole blasted shop. No 100% score this time around.

£40.69 is the total amount of my accomodation deposit that Sheffield University has decided to return. Which means they spent £59.31 on fixing the door to the block that everyone kept breaking. And a new carpet. And fixing the door.